壮汉战蛛记

Concept: A man sees a spider on the wall. He responds with the intensity of a home invasion. Characters: Dave, a large, muscular man in a bathrobe. Escalation: He rolls behind the couch like it's cover fire. Army-crawls to the kitchen for a shoe. Returns in a tactical crouch with oven mitts as armor. The spider moves one inch, Dave screams and throws the shoe through the TV. He duct-tapes himself into a protective suit. Pulls out a leaf blower. Visual Punchline: His tiny daughter walks in, picks up the spider bare-handed, puts it outsidethe house, and gives him a disappointed look. Dave salutes her.